Confidence Over Comparison

Kelsey Lensman, ATC


You’re scrolling and scrolling and scrolling. Perfect hair. Perfect abs. Perfect muscles. Perfect smiles. She looks like she has it all together. Why can’t I look like that? If only I had her abs, then I would be happy. Why can’t I be her?

Does this sound familiar? It’s me. It’s you. It’s everyone that has ever had an encounter with the beautiful little thing we call social media. What was intended to be a place where we share our unique, beautiful lives with family and friends has now turned into a place that breeds insecurity, comparison, and the constant battle of wondering if you’re enough even as young as 8 years old.

The keywords of the paragraph above are UNIQUE lives. However, uniqueness is lost when you are bombarded by a society that tries to paint the picture of their perfect life over and over and over again. What you don’t see are the 800 pictures beforehand that she was unhappy with to finally get that PERFECT picture with that PERFECT angle and that PERFECT editing. What you don’t see is two seconds later after she is flexing her abs that she looks just like you and me with not perfect chiseled 6-pack abs (disclaimer: no one walks around with perfect 6-pack abs, so comparing yourself to this is unrealistic). What you don’t see is a strict nutrition plan and training program that cannot possibly be sustained in everyday life (I fell to this too – but let me tell you.. that look is NOT sustainable). What you don’t see is what isn’t in that frame.

Comparing yourself to those you see on social media can be the quickest blow to your self-esteem or inner confidence that is trying to hard to tell you that you are enough. You need to remember – there is so much that you don’t see. No one lives that perfect life. No one wakes up and is 100% confident everyday. Everyone struggles like you and me. Everyone has things they deal with on a daily basis. But, you don’t see that so you compare to what you see.

The biggest thing that has changed my life and led me to a path of freedom is: focus on yourself. Surround yourself with things that build you up not tear you down. You may be on mile 1, but are comparing yourself to someone that is on mile 22. It took them 22 miles to get there. Many things take time. If you start to feel yourself compare or think negative thoughts: unfollow, delete, get the heck rid of whatever that is making you do that. If that’s unfollowing someone, unfollow them. Don’t surround yourself with information, people, or absolutely anything that takes your focus on what matters – your own dang thing. We struggle. We fall down. We aren’t always confident. And THAT’S OKAY. But, one thing is we always need to get back up. We need to remember – it’s a dang picture that doesn’t tell the whole story. Confidence > Comparison.